Repose in nothingness, but not really.

Despite quite heavily enjoying the luxury to sleep however long I please, repose in nothingness is not quite what I am looking for right now. I am, as Jon already put it, planning my next exit (especially now that my request for a gap year has been approved).

Still Miles From Home

I am still at sea. I've been on a succession of boats now. They're nice, but it just reminds me, with acute similarity to my time spent in a stuffy, wooden, spider-infested cabin in the mountains of Norway, that being in close proximity with my parents for any extended period of time is like entrusting a cache of petrol and matches to an inquisitive yet foolish 5-year old. After spending the aforementioned few days in 'Gamlestova', owned by an old sailor who spoke only the Northern Norwegian dialect and with whom i had great difficulty communicating, i visited good Herr Poleo of Oslo Town. Quite a delectable meal we shared there, with much inebriation and merriment thanks to Natthasit of Siam and Moses of Arabia. My parents were of constant amusement, encouraging me emphatically to converse with them despite my reluctance to do so. When i began to talk to them, they would never fail to interrupt me to start some argument or screaming:


"tell me about school Jon! How was it?"
"um...good....we have lots of people from all around the world and-"
"JECCA! WHERE THE HELL IS MY BLUE JACKET OH MY GOD YOU SET IT ON FIRE DIDNT YOU!"
"NO TIM I BLAH BLAH BLAH YOU GAVE ME THE WRONG DIRECTIONS TO ESBJERG THIS IS YOUR FAULT YOU ARE THE DEVIL IN DISGUISE ADMIT IT!"

*silence*

"sorry Jon, tell me more, you went to school in.....Finland?"


Anyway. A brief boat trip took us to Copenhagen where i quickly lost them amongst the pubs and parks. I met up with Jacob and a friend of his from the states. We drank in the parks and walked around, meeting (with incredible coincidence) some Hongkongese atlantic college graduates (they didnt know you Nat, but naturally, they knew Marcus). We looked into a arbitrary hat shop and met Gustav. We bought some more beer. Called various people. Liv met us. She showed us to an excellent waterpipe cafe. We went to lots of bars and had a great time, me sleeping on Jacob's floor at 4am.

Now i'm back on a damn boat with failing internet, electricity, keyboard and patience. All things that i value highly. My parents are arguing with the cabin staff; they didnt believe me that when a dane says "half seven" he means 6:30, so now hes complaining at some poor spotty jutland teenager. Not long before i'm back at home and i can plan my next exit. Just hope i find some leprechaun with a pot of gold to fund my travels.

I feel it's time to go to the bar; there are free drinks now because my dad is good at complaining it seems. Ah well, there are positive sides to annoying parents.

Nunc est bibendum.

work

Dear all,

It is with regret I inform you that I no longer possess a life. Anything I do nowadays is linked to a "beep" or cutting something with a stanley knife. Either that, or operating some heavy cardboard-crunching machinery. I have got a job.

Getting up in the morning, either at 05.00 or 06.00 is all right. Getting cuts all over my hands is FINE. Eating bread with strawberry jam for dinner is nice. Not having a clue what the hell I am doing most of the time is ok. I could go on and on. But being supervised by a SWEDE? In Norway?!

No thank you. Fuck's sake.

Poléo

Está mal, está mal...

Cá vai,

My grandmother:
The sweetest old grandmother one can have. As small as Bianka(I swear to God) and just as kind and calm. She laughs a lot and makes lots of jokes about spanish people. Right now she is a bit weak because she had a heart operation less than a year ago, she's very thin and her head is not as good as before. 78 years old.
She's always lived with my grandfather in little town.

Today my mother woke me up in the early hours of dawn and two hours later we were in my grandparents place to have lunch(at 1pm). We got there cooked up a bit, ate, drunk some coffee with whiskey and a piece of chocolate.

I then noticed that my grandmother had a big damn bruise on her left arm as she lifted it the put the whiskey bottle back in place. I said: "Wtf granny?!"

So she then followed to explain us that one of my cousins(a 45 year old man which I have always greatly admired and thought of him as a great person, whom my family and specially grandmother helped to bring up and cared about as her own child) had hit her in the arm because the price of the potatoes my grandmother wanted to sell him for his restaurant did not please him...So he hit her on her arm and left that big bruise and then buggered off. That happened not long ago.

After this I look at my father, he gets up and I follow him. We were both PISSED OFF MAN. He goes to the back door of the restaurant gets in and makes him come out. He was way so out of himself that he barely let his own son touch him.

I have never seen him like that- and I've seen him out of himself many times.

Once we thought he was knocked out and our backs were turned towards him he managed to sort of jump and grab my legs. Unexpectedly(please do laugh) I fell!*Tada* Got myself a little cut on the head- 2 stitches.(Can't barely be seen though but bled a lot)

What happens afterwards will not really contribute for anything at all so I will just cut it, however I can tell that I have a very small fracture(it's not even a fracture, just a little bit of the bone that got disconnected with the main bone, very little I can move it just needs ice and a cream) on my little right hand finger from...well hope you get it.

All the care I had for my cousin disappeared once my grandmother told me he had hit her, same with my father...It was terrible and we never expected something like that. How would you have dealt with a similar situation in your countries???Please do comment and tell me how it would have been. It's important for me.

In addition for today...
Got home something like half an hour ago and on the way i get a phone call from the wife of one of my close friends saying that he had a car accident and broke his chest.
Interesting...

The doctor didn't say anything about not going to the shot party and drinking absynth shots for 50 euro cents with Lena tonight, hope it will make me feel better...

Cat

Ok guys, you're not gonna believe this! I'm still in shock!

I've been doing the usual today, just learning about Marroccan culture.

I was sitting in the office having a chat with Sara and I saw a cat passing in front of the door leading into my bedroom where the window is opened.

The cat stood on my bed and stared at me. I stared at him back and for some odd reason I said "miao".

The bloke replied something in his language which i did not comprehend and just like that got out of the window.

The thing now is: Either you believe this actually occured. Or you go for the second opinion which is that I must have taken LSD instead of the vitamin pills by mistake.

I prefer the second one, however never saw LSD coming inside little round boxes...

Fucking cat

Vasco: Thank You

Thank you Vasco for your interesting story. It was such a delightful read. I was actually tremendously happy that I decided to read it and did not fall a sleep while reading it at all.

I am bored now, thanks to Andreas and Nat. Fuck you, Andreas and Nat. I hate you, Andreas and Nat because you are such boring people, who smell like shite.

I am also hungry, and I am about to die from hunger. Thank you Andreas for not only making me feel bored, but also killing me.

I am flying to Israel tomorrow.

(I am going to miss you all though)

What happened Yesterday...

Hej maggots,

Yesterday in general was quite an amusing day. Here goes what happened:

I woke up and spent 2 hours watching everything fall and brake and torn and blow and bleed and pain and collapse and fuck and BOOOM and my grandmother being desperate, and I couldn't do a flying fucking thing to make it the way i like it. Straight after that I went out and put everything together again with the Help of Moroccan fags, nice.
Chilled a bit in the nature checked out a few of the animals around and then cruised home to have some breAKFast(no it was not 4 six packs sorry:S, and btw it was 6 o'clock in the afternoon).

|brake| First year economic students keep on asking me advice about IA when I HAVE FINISHED MY FUCKING IB AND I DON'T FUCKING GIVE A FLYING FUCK ABOUT I FUCKING A's ANY FUCKING LONGER. example: Maria - redefining? says:
i've started writing, made some graphs, and i'll include evaluation anything specific u think i should mention as working on this article? |brake over|Sorry for this...a bit of a anger burst...

Anyways, I got home and ate the left overs from lunch (Carapaus fritos de arroz de tomate for those interested) and then the bell rings. It was my mate, Sérgio! He greeted my family and we went out to his car to have another Marrocan fag(I am so seriously now, you can't see shit after 5 minutes inside the car). While enjoying the fag he asked me whether I wanted (don't ask me why) to go to a party for the university recent graduates where Fados would be play also with this guy Zé Mendes(which can't sing for shit, If I am bad he's much worse believe me) and another one Quim Barreiros(This one is just well tacky). Basically what we were fixing up for the night was to go to the most shit music concert ever! Where people dance like fucking retards and you really can't enjoy it unless you're drunker than jon after going to the forest with me.

I said: "Fuck it, alright, let's go!".

Then something insanely magic started...As I got out the car I began to meet tons of people, seriously. The 200 meters that lead from the place where the car was parked until the party place I met around 100 people I hadn't seen in ages! It is so funny to meet ex girlfriends after a looong time! it's all like: Ex: Oi, how are you? Me:Wicked, Wicked. Give me your number for us to go for a coffee or something. Ex: Nah sorry...I have a boyfriend now... . Then her boyfriend appears and they turn out to be my friends from before... This particular thing happened with a girl called Lena(I'll give details later). Other encounters took place but they were just vulgar... no need to make you dear readers dip into dipshit portuguese vulgarity.

On the way I met this guy from my waterpolo team whom I hadn't seen in 2 years! He takes me and my mate to this bar, just by the party venue, and says that the wine would be for free tonight for me and my mate, very nice!(I leave what happened in the following hour for your imagination)

We got into the party venue and the Fados were on Already. FUUUUUCK. I couldn't take it. I have to confess even drunk it sucks. I always say it is nice because I am afraid someone would beat me up for being a Portuguese who doesn't like Fados...BUT IT IS UGLY, DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AND IT ISN'T POETIC AT ALL LIKE EVERYONE SAYS! IT SUCKS BIG FUCKING TIME! So...My mate Sergio took out a Morrocan fag, king size one. Just what I needed. ahahah. After that...Fados became theeeeeeeeee shit man! All the beauty, poetry, joy, melody caressed my body and soul like no one ever did! Beautiful.

While Zé Mendes and Quim Barreiros played we smoked 2 or 3 more Morrocan fags. There was a fight somewhere as always(fucking gypsies) and while this fight was on Lena(the girl I me which boyfriend is one of my best friends) came up to me. The only thing I have to say is that I absolutely love Mediterranean culture and ways. No more comments...

It was around 5 am and my mate was way too fucking trashed. As In way too fucking trashed. I carried him to his car where he has an alcoholmeter thing like the coppers have, he blows it 2.4 grams he had...no way he could drive. I blew, 2.0. Vasco had to do the driving...Really freaking out experience, drove slowly though...(Point of information...with above 0.5 you can get into serious shit...like arrested and shit specially if you do NOT have a drivers license) He lives really far away like 30 km away and then I had to drive back with a car which isn't mine... Dropped him home and drove back to my home. Then had some MUNCHIES MAN, MUNCHIES MAN!!!Was heaven...Afterwards...dreaming time...

OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! It was absolutely transcendental! I had a dream where I was caressing pieces of art! And there was this really groovy drum and bass sort of song going on in the background and I saw these pieces of art like paintings and so on. All were so surrealist yet minimalist and colorfull. So Amazing! The feeling i got from it was that I was caressing a female body. I could feel it all, however i could not see it! All i could see was my hands caressing Art pieces and the feellings I had was that i was touching a female body. So damn nice. This went on for what seemed hours!!!Then I heard Marta's voice: Vasquinho...

And straight after my mate phones me: WHERE THE FUCK IS THE BLOODY CAR?!?!?!

Fuck...

New User

Hey,

I created a new BlogSpot user, as I had a new e-mail address since February, and it is bloody, and in fact, not only bloody but also damn annoying to change all the time from that e-mail account to the other one, when I am trying to write here and in my own blog.

Anyhow, it is not a mistake! From today, there are two Mushis - Mushi and Mushi.

(I am so bored, and all my lame friends are sleeping!)

HAHAHAHAHA

Right. I am sitting in my living room at my father's place, laughing loudly. It's not as odd as it seems though, cos there are other people here. Had I been alone and laughing loudly I would be insane.

I am currently with Bianka and Nat. That's an ambiguous sentence, with no banana to whom figures out why.

I could make this entry into a heap of one-liners, I don't know about the quality of that though...

Moses; your post was hilarious by the way, that's what made me laugh hard and loudly. Haha.

I am looking forward to seeing you lads tomorrow, along with Jon's parents; hopefully we'll have a nice time. The only flaw in the plan is that I am going to work at 07.00 hours the day after. Anyway, it's fine.

On the other hand I am not looking forward to tomorrow, Bianka is leaving Norway, which of course is a good thing, objectively speaking. As some might know, my view is perhaps slightly subjective.

That's all for now folks, I'll go for a walk with Bianka and Nat (Yes, a normal walk).

Poléo

Hello

Hey Guys,

what's up?

Good initiative by the idiot (i.e. Jonathan James King). I was planning to do that, but until now I did not have internet (I am in a cabin, in Otta or something like that).

I got to speak some Norwegian today. Me and my parents tried to buy some food but the woman there was incompetent, when it is coming to English and simple Maths (first she was not able to speak any language, and second she also failed to calculate the final price of our combined meal). I guess one can say the following about her: "hun er en dum kvinne". No one is perfect though.

Go to the Trollstigen! It is such a cool and beautiful passage.

I am still in this bloody country as well. Sucks to be me, though it is such a beautiful country. I am happy to see a bit of it, before I am leaving to my little town, Sederot, located in the Israeli Negev.

A random conversation now of my parents (just now!):
Mother (entering the toilet): "How did you create this smell?"
Father: "I took a very good poo".
Mother: "There is a need for a window in this toilet"
Father: "Too bad. Wait until the smell will go away".

I need to get use to my parents again...they are already annoying me too much, with unnecessary questions and actions. I guess this is the consequences of living without them for a year, one can argue even two. They are funny sometimes though, but not for long.

Jon and Andreas - looking forward to see you tomorrow (probably the last time until who knows when. I'll probably arrive Oslo in the evening. We shall get properly drunk

Real World Recall

Ok, so 24 hours ago I was sitting on a chair at the front of the Auditorium and realising that I would have to somehow, terribly, finally leave college. Right now I'm sitting on a chair in a hotel in Floro, so close but yet so far (i'm even still in this bloody country!), with everything reminding me of RCN and the final realisation that I'm going to be very alone soon coming to me like the sunlight; filtered, ephemeral and frequently obscured by fog. The hotel room isn't much in comparison to 102. Hey, i've got my own bathroom, but its quite small, and i doubt i could fit a narghila in there, even a dinky one. There's not much to say about Floro either. They fish here. Their komune symbol is fish. We ate fish today. I can smell fish from the open window. I spend another 2 days in a cabin by Sognefjord then I'll be in Oslo. What i just realised and what makes me so angry is that i probably won't be there in time to see Bianka...bollocks...

Bianka, if i don't make it, i'll have to come to Nicaragua or you come to England...
let me remind you my Spanish sucks, so you come to England, ok? good good.

Anyway, this post was meant to initiate this blog and i hope that lots of us can contribute and use it as a way to accurately measure and maintain our asskickage from all corners of the globe.